okay…today I actually ponied up and when I did my yoga (which I am not nearly as dedicated to  as I should be) I added in a specific form of kundalini kriyas (a form of movement and breathing that opens charkas). Now, I am by nature a skeptic about all of that because I have encountered far too many flakes who toss those words around as excuses to get them out of being responsible for their own lives. Chakras, karma  - you name it, terms like this have been usurped by the great god “I can’t help it.”

But…I have had some very strange stuff going on in my life of late (half of which I haven’t talked about here because I would have no idea where to even begin) and I was doing some research and tripped across something that led me to believe that trying to do a kriya, particularly the Heart Chakra Kriya (where you use the “breath of fire” – it just sounds cool) would help me to participate in the seeming random coincidences flying through my life.

Because there is no such thing as a random coincidence now is there? But often, lacking any concept of what to do, we just sit and let things happen around us and hope that one of them will give us instructions on what our part is supposed to be.

So, I found out about this particular kriya, it fit with what was going on in my life and I watched the video. And that is when I found out that after a year of trying to sit in the lotus pose that the little MF-ers sit on a damn pillow to do it. I mean, even I can do that.

So I am on my pillow doing my thing, which is remarkably similar to flapping one’s arms like a bird or a drunk cheerleader and breathing fire (which is also remarkably similar to making choo choo noises only with your mouth closed) and when I was done, I lay in corpse pose (exactly what it sounds like) and was just shocked at how much my muscles felt like they had just spent three hours lifting weights.

And then I stood up.

And that was enough to sell me on the whole process. I felt so…calm, centered, downright powerful with no need to fight. The “breath of fire” is a means of breathing that floods your body with oxygen and the movement of your arms pumps your heart and circulation so it all goes speeding through you. What was surprising was the sense of …capability that came with it all.

Then I signed on line and did my twitter thing and noticed that I have a celebrity listserv following me and just started killing myself laughing.

Me and my new found strong self sailed down to the corner store and bought Charleston chews and here I am.

Doing my thing.

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